My house is a mess. My boys are a handful and then some. I've had one shower and one bath in the last 8 days. I'm tired. I'm sore. I'm edgy and grumpy. My husband had to go back to work on Monday and since I don't like asking people for help, I'm on my own. I managed to do one load of dishes on Monday, nothing on Tuesday, and although my house is falling apart at the seams it's not looking like I have the will to clean today either. My house has never been this messy, and it is driving me crazy, but just adjusting to four kids four and under and the demands of an (extremely sweet and calm) infant is wearing me thin. Seriously if my little strawberry wasn't the angel that she has been I might have had a total melt down by now, but so far I'm still hanging in there. Maybe I should focus on what I have done.
I have pushed out a big beautiful baby girl, that was no easy task! I've managed to only freak out on my husband one time in the past week. I've done pretty good at over looking the little stuff that usually drives me crazy (sort of) or at least not addressing it right now. I've managed to feed and cloth and even give my boys a bath this week. I took them all to the library yesterday when we had hit a wall and it was going to get real ugly if we didn't get out. I managed to get them all in and then back out of the library with out much fuss and we even stopped at a park for a bit on the way home. I've managed to spend one on one time with all my boys during the past week to remind them of how special they are to me, and to try to make up for all my grumpy in between.
I know this overwhelming part only lasts so long. I know I will be feeling better soon and life will flow the way it is suppose to. I know that I just need to tuck my head down and force my way though this rough patch...but...that knowledge is not making me feel better right now. I'm thinking it might be a crying in the shower sort of day, if I could even take a shower.