Nothing but fluff

I always come up with great blog post ideas in my head while doing the dishes, or driving, or cleaning the house, etc...but then when I actually get a quiet moment to sit down an the computer my mind goes blank. So I guess I'll just ramble because I feel the need to write.

My first born son is turning five next week...ack! My baby girl is going to be one in October...double ack! She is already trying to walk! I went on a walk with the children yesterday and watched my boys running on ahead as I pushed my little girl in the stroller and my heart felt full to bursting. I love what they are becoming and what I see in them. All their different and some times amusing personalities. Parenting is so hard but so worth it when you see the results of all your hard work. {Hard when you are not seeing the results yet and are instead questioning yourself and your worth as a parent on a daily or hourly basis.} I want my baby girl to stay a baby and at the same time I can't wait to see her running around with her brothers. I am so ready to move on to the next stage that doesn't involve me having babies anymore. I've always been emotional about that before, not yet ready to move on. Makes me feel old, moving out of the baby stage. But I guess with a birthday looming around the corner now I feel old anyways and more then ready to watch {and help} them grow into capable adults. Plus I'm back to an even number again {we were going to stop at two} and I don't wait to screw that up...six kids would equal a mini bus and I doubt my ability to drive that thing safely... ;) And no I do not know why I feel the compulsory need to have an even amount of children, I've got quite a lot of weird quirks, maybe I'll share them some day. Then again...maybe not.

Atty has asked about his bio brother Evan a lot lately. When they first left every time someone would knock on the door he would say "brother Evan" and get all excited. Or he would stand at the window and say "brother Evan coming?" Heart breaking. A couple times he asked to go to brother Evan's house and when I told him we couldn't and why he would just get upset and start to fuss so now I just say something like that would be fun wouldn't it and change the subject. He responds to that better. We do hope to go visit them someday, but they do live two states away so it would be a major {and expensive} road trip for us. Maybe in a few years when all the kids are a bit older. I wish they lived closer and the boys could grow up seeing each other more often, but I am thankful that they get to stay in contact.

Spike, who is four month younger then Atty, has taken to being Atty's "big brother". It's funny and Atty doesn't seem to mind. On the walk yesterday Spike at one point was chasing after Atty telling him to hold his hand and then when Atty did he turned to me and said "I'm taking care of Atty mom" in a very grown up voice. It was cute. He's been taking his big brother responsibility with his sister very seriously as well. I guess he was tired of being the little brother. I'd have to say he makes a great big brother! His sister adores him. He does like to pester like a little brother though, he's a mischievous one my little Spike. And competitive. Very. I've heard that is often a little brother trait, always trying to prove you're as good or better then the bigger siblings.

Bubu is starting swimming lessons in September and he's so excited. We went to the Y to sign him up and he saw the pool and could hardly contain himself. He wants to be a life guard that saves people, too cute! Atty asked if there were any sharks in there, ha, ha! Ira made sure to let me know he wanted nothing to do with that pool. I don't know why he is so afraid of water, I truly don't...He was my only baby actually born in the water at my midwifes clinic and he's my only child afraid of water, hummmmmm...weird. It was a bit of a scary birth, but not because of the water and he wasn't too upset after he was born. I don't remember anything scary happening to him in water. He's always hated getting his hair washed though, oh my goodness if you didn't know any better you would think something unspeakable was happening to him when it comes time to wash his hair! Anyways I started this paragraph off with Bubu swimming and ended with Ira getting his hair washed, that is some serious rambling!

I've got plenty of other things to ramble on about but I'm pretty sure you've got to be bored out of your mind by now {if your even still reading} so I'll end it here. I keep wanting to write a post about some changes I've been trying to make in the way we are living and eating but I'm not sure where to start with that one or if I even want to go into it on here so I just keep running it around in my brain.