Monday, October 10, 2011

Where's the oobie fairy?

I think my little girl is going to be hard to wean...

I've never made it this far with any of the boys, I always got pregnant again and it was uncomfortable to nurse them and made me feel super grumpy so for both of our sakes I always weaned them to a bottle. Then at two the bottle fairy always came and took the bottles, left a treat, and that was the end of that. Not happening that way this time and I am at a loss. Part of me wants to wean her and another part of me doesn't really care just yet. She hardly nurses, just once before nap time and once before bed. I tried cutting out the nap time one today because she just turned two and I figure I should start in that direction. But she started crying and saying "sorry mommy, sorry mommy" and it killed me. Seriously, I'm tearing up just thinking about it. I kept telling her there wasn't anything to be sorry about, that she didn't do anything I just wanted her to take a bottle and we would snuggle, but she was heart broken. I teetered on the edge of being hard hearted about it and firming my resolve, but I just don't care enough yet to do that. So I nursed her and she was so sweet and happy and then fell blissfully to sleep. Which is so much better then what would have happened if I had continued to insist on a bottle. There is a huge part of me that feels guilty nursing Lala longer then I did her brothers. If I wean her now then it's not too much different then it was with them, but if I take a more relaxed approach {Which is what I was planning on doing with all of them before the whole pregnant while breast feeding thing got factored in.} I feel like they didn't get a fair deal and it makes me feel bad. Not that the reasoning really makes any since or should be a consideration for her... but there it is in my mind none the less... What's a girl to do? She's my last baby and I just don't feel as rushed with her as I did with the boys. With them, in retrospect, I was so rushed and strict about what happened when... keeping them all on the same schedule, doing it all the same. But with Lala it's all been different, some in little ways, others in big ways. I don't know if it's because she's a girl, or she's the last, or I'm just tired and more lazy. I'm definitely way more tired... and old. I guess I've just relaxed more on some things and don't feel so uptight about it all any more. Either way, she is not going to be an easy one to wean, because she plays me like a fiddle, and because I just don't really feel this big push to wean her this time around... Not saying I'm going to nurse her until she's five or anything, I guess today is just not the day. And neither is tomorrow...

I'd have to say that the bottle fairy makes things a whole lots easier!

Where's the oobie fairy when you need her?

{Oobie is what all my kiddos have called nursing.}

1 comment:

Kat said...

Oh man, that's hard. And I have no advice for you. All of my boys weaned themselves by 1 year and Grace weaned herself at 15 months. She was down to just before bed at night and then I started reading her books and singing to her and that was enough to get her sleepy enough to lie down.
You'll both know. For now, don't stress about it.
When you are ready maybe you could get her a new "baby" doll that she could mommy. You know tell her at nap time that she is a big girl now but she needs to nurse her baby to sleep or something. ??? Some people are uncomfortable with that but I think it is sweet. :)

Good luck!